It is with renewed spirit that I am writing today.. hearing medical terms, living in a hospital and trying to wrap your brain around the fact that your world has been turned upside down is daunting to say the least. After a visit with a dear friend (also friend of my moms) yesterday evening that helped me find my center again. If I lead with my head I am terrified of all of the information coming my way, if I lead with my heart I am sick with grief for this situation, but if I lead with my gut.. my real compass I KNOW we are going to be just fine. That said I think we are getting ready to walk through fire but we will come out the other side stronger and if it's possible even more in love with our daughter.
A long time friend has been sending me quotes that have helped me through these days.. a recent one that seems to fit just right is from Winston Churchill.. "If you are going through hell, keep going."
We met with the Attending doctor who specializes in Georgia's type of cancer (more than Leukemia) and she gave us the most clear information we've had to date. The picture is still not clear and we will be taking careful steps to make sure we are heading down the right path. They still can't find another case where someone has presented with the symptoms that Georgia has but if you look at it in just a slightly more general setting there are about two in a million a year.
Today Georgia had another bone marrow aspirate, bone marrow biopsy and spinal tap as well as some DNA testing to help lead us to the answers we are still seeking.
A lot of people have offered to get tested to see if they would potentially be a bone marrow match for Georgia .. I am asking questions about that and as of right now it sounds like people would just have to sign up to be a general donor which would go into the World Bank that they are looking at. I will find and post the website with the correct information when I have it.
Tomorrow is a ultrasound of her heart and insertion of the Hickman catheter - essentially surgery. Friday our Oncology team is meeting with the transplant to discuss the plan moving forward. After that meeting we will have a meeting to hopefully come up with the Georgia Cure Plan.
Again, I am overwhelmed with the support everyone has shown, I can't tell you how much it helps us. There have been countless offers to bring us anything.. that time isn't now but it is coming. We need a little more time to see what path we will be on then we will have a clearer picture of the help we need.
The Hickman Cathater will be a blessing... no more of those pesky IVs in the way... fewer pokes from the nurses.
ReplyDeleteA few of us met in the street today and all talked about what was happening and how sad we all are and how we are all praying for Georgia and both you and Brian. You are parents now... now you know there are no limits to the joy, happiness and pain that comes with being a parent. There is nothing you won't do to ensure her comfort, happiness and health. You are stronger now then you have ever been before in your life. LOVE is the reason. There is no stronger force.
Know that your neighbors love you and your family. We all miss you and are praying for Georgia's health and for your family to come home and we will all be here for you.
Anna shared this with us earlier, here's the link to join the bone marrow donor registry: http://www.marrow.org/JOIN/index.html?src=tabjoin
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you have a wonderful team of doctors leading you in kicking cancer's ass. I'm praying, as is my entire church. You and Georgia are in my thoughts! If you'd like a visit there, let us know- Sophie would love to see her friend. We're sending you all love and prayers! Stay strong!
I think of her everyday. Your beautiful family is included in out thoughts and prayers. We're sending you a huge hug!
ReplyDeleteyou are in inspiration, Alison. It will be a tough road and a tearful battle for you guys, but you have tons of support, love and prayers from lots of people. Here's to the Georgia Cure Plan!
ReplyDeleteSo glad to hear your have found your inner compass and are feeling centered. I can't begin to imagine the overwhelming feeling as information and medical terms come swirling about and things fade in and out of focus as the doctors work on the Georgia Cure Plan. It sounds like you have a great team around you. I know it's hard to see your baby girl like this, but the best is yet to be! Go, Georgia, Go! I'll be praying for the doctors, nurses, and the Handsaker Family!
ReplyDeleteAlison,
ReplyDeleteToday as we celebrate the birthday of our 2 year old son, Jack, our joy is bitersweet, as our hearts are so very sad for you and your precious family. Nearly one year ago, November 6, 2009, we too received the devastating news that my husband, Tom, had leukemia (AML). At 33, this was unbelievable. Our world came crashing down around us. Suddenly we were learning "cancer speak" and throwing around terms like Hickman Line, blasts and neutrophils. Like Georgia, he entered the hospital on the day of his diagnosis, began chemotherapy just a few days later and did not return home for five weeks, leaving us with the question, "Where did our lives go?"
It has been a long road...two bone marrow transplants 7 rounds of chemotherapy and Tom is still fighting daily to survive this disease. Our little Jack has made this journey so much easier to bear with his innocent smile and extravagant love...
Know this: The journey upon which you are about to embark is a a tough one. It will test every fiber of who you are as a family, a couple, and as an individual. But you CAN do this! I can tell already from the tenacity I see in your writing that you have the will and the strength required to stare in the face of cancer and fight back. Georgia is counting on this strength.
I teach with Alexis at CHS and have told her that I will add little Georgia to our Caringbridge site and ask that she be prayed for by our prayer team. Tom has literally thousands of people and congregations praying for him all across the country and now, Georgia will, too!
Please don't hesitate to call or email me anytime with questions or if you just want to vent with someone who truly knows the depth of this agony in which you now find yourself. Georgia has not left my thoughts for one minute since Alexis shared your news with me last week. Please know that I am thinking of ALL of you and pray for your strength and wisdom for the doctors who are treating your sweet little girl.
With HOPE,
Karen Rowland
karenms@comcast.net
www.caringbridge.org/visit/tomrowland1975
Your strength and grace are inspirational my friend. I find myself logging on to your blog and getting so much peace from your words when this is the exact thing I should be doing for you. Its this very poise and strength that is going to carry you through this tough time. Georgia is so lucky to be in your arms and I too just know she is going to get through this. I spoke to my mother in law and father in law today and told them all about Georgia. They too want to help but even more comforting is they both felt that the outcome of this is going to be good. They of course said that you have a fight on your hands but in their experience they have faith that you are all going to come out on the other side even stronger. I took solice in their words as they are both so incredibly knowledgable regarding anatomy and physiology and are both practicing physicians. I hope it brings you some comfort too. I love all three of you endlessly and am thinking and praying for you every minute. I am praying to Mary, because I have heard and believe that its the mommys that fix everything and I know she is going to fix this too!
ReplyDeleteAlison,
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking of you and your family daily, and I'm continuously impressed with your strength. You are an utterly courageous woman and Georgia is truly blessed to have you as her mother. I know there are no words to ease the pain and frustration you must be experiencing, but your determination (and that which you've passed on to Georgia) will be your guiding light. Keep going Alison! You and your little peach can do it!