I want my life back.. I don't know how else to put it. I miss my simple, happy, making it all work life. We had some friends visit today - it was SO good to see them, feel their love and support and also have a little distraction from our daily life here. When we walked our friends out of our room this evening I was overcome with that feeling you got as a kid of wanting to stomp my feet and pound my fists because I wanted to go to. Why is this happening???? This isn't fair. I see so many pictures of people taking their kids to the pumpkin patch and am so frustrated that we literally can't do that. My family of three is living in one room that has one window that faces another building. We are taking Georgia outside each day because once her blood levels drop we won't be allowed to leave this floor.. this makes me feel claustrophobic. We should be raking leaves in our backyard and having her play in them, we should be going for long walks on these crisp fall days but instead my baby starts chemotherapy next week - how are we here?