Minutes

As this year draws to a close I'm ready, ready to move forward and put the heartaches of the last 12 months a little further behind us. The lyrics of a song from the Broadway show Rent have been playing over and over in my head for weeks, almost haunting me.... 525,600 minutes, how do you measure, measure a year? Every time this line plays in my head I fight back tears. So many minutes that have left scars on my heart. 
We have made many friends through this journey, we keep tabs on some through their blogs and websites - several months ago one mom wrote that she'd been reminded that we're all Gods children, so our children are really just on loan to us. I have struggled with this immensely this year, many times I have pictured myself in a complete rage screaming at God, "SHE'S MINE!!" and yet equally as many times I have whispered out loud, "please let me keep her."
As the year has gone by I have done less arguing and negotiating with God and more looking around to see all of the things I am grateful for.  I remember so many minutes of love pouring in from far and wide, the rally of support has been astounding.  One thing is certain, I could not have survived the last year without Georgia, I realize this sounds a little odd given the context, but she is what keeps me going and keeps my faith alive.  In the minutes where I didn't think I would make it she would fill me up again.  She is a ball of energy, joy and love all wrapped up in a darling little two year old girl - she's amazing.
My hope, my wish and my prayer for the coming year is that the minutes have less to do with doctors, meds, GVHD and cancer and are instead filled with playing, growing, laughing and living. 

Here's to a HEALTHY 2012 and beyond.  Happy New Year.