Handsaker Family Blog: Two Years

A celebration of transplant is certainly an odd one, I am so thankful that we were able to get to transplant and now two years beyond, but the feelings around all that we, especially Georgia, has been through feels anything but celebratory.
There are certain things I'll never forget, there was so much chaos in the beginning but I will never forget our doctor walking in to tell us the official diagnosis and that Georgia had about a 50% chance of survival, what as a mother was I supposed to do with that information? We knew the only chance of beating this was a bone marrow transplant so that is where we set our sights. Determined as always, we were thankful that her body responded to chemotherapy, some people never get to a place where their body is ready to take that step. One mother described transplant as, "knocking on deaths door." I would describe it as knocking on deaths door, praying to God no one answers, then turning to run up the steepest mountain, only to find you are wearing lead boots. The process is slow and as much as I have wanted and wished we could speed through things, you must respect the process of allowing the body to heal.
The last week has brought many tears, remembering where we were two years ago and how much Georgia has had to endure. Some of Georgia's doctors have said that she is too young to remember what happened, she is showing me otherwise. Recently Georgia asked, "Mama, remember my friends with with the lines, Celah and Hunter?" Georgia hasn't seen them in over a year but remembers them as her friends and that they both had NG tubes. Some of this will fade with time but that will only be replaced by questions of what happened and the unanswerable, why?
For me, there are wounds that will never heal, things too painful to ever fully recover from. This isn't to say that I dwell on them, all of this has certainly taught me to enjoy the simplest of things, my daughters smiling face tops that list.
So today we gave thanks for a few things, Georgia and the miracle that she is, the astounding support from so many that has carried us through, and the person who made so much of this possible, Mr. Germany.
Next week we start in-depth testing at the SCCA but today we are happy, hopeful and so incredibly grateful for Georgia. Happy two years post transplant my love.