One Year Ago

One year ago I never saw the train coming, the one that completely derailed life as I knew it. It was a Monday morning and Georgia was still cranky, bothered by what I thought was a pulled muscle in her leg. I called our pediatrician and she said to come in, it was clear once she looked at her leg that something was going on. We were sent to Children's Hospital for a quick x-ray to rule out a hairline fracture - Georgia was learning to pull up on things so although unlikely, it was possible that she'd injured it in some way.

I remember talking to Brian on the drive over, he asked if he should meet us there, I said not to bother, we'd be on our way home by the time he got there. After the x-ray we waited for a bit then a man came into the waiting room and sat down next to me, he was the radiologist who'd reviewed Georgia's x-ray. He said there was a mass on her leg, that it was either an infection or a tumor, he said someone would be coming to walk us over to the emergency department... I will never forget the feeling of sheer terror that washed over me. It quickly became clear that this wasn't an infection, and just like that, Brian and I were meeting an oncologist and talking about cancer - Georgia was 10 months old.

The past year has been unthinkable, watching Georgia go through test after test, sedation after sedation - her information was sent to experts in San Francisco, Germany and studied at Harvard all to land in a place where she needed chemotherapy and a bone marrow transplant to survive. The things Georgia has endured are incomprehensible - her little body poisoned again and again in a effort to make her well. Watching nurses "suit up" in a gown, gloves and mask that covers their entire face as to not get a drop on them of what they are injecting into my baby. Even a year later I still have moments when I can't believe this is our story. Georgia is still on immune suppression, steroids, antibiotics and has a feeding tube, this process is far from over. Through every minute of this journey Georgia has been so brave, so patient and so resilient - I can't even put into words the love I have for my child.

I will never know the reason why this has happened but I feel a strong need to put purpose to it. I'm different now, and will never be the person I was one year and one day ago. The things I've seen in the past year have changed how I see the world, how I am in it and what is important to me.

I didn't know Ben, and I've never met the Towne Family but the work their foundation is doing is incredible. The idea that we could have been delivered the same news and Georgia's treatment would have only given her the side effects of having a cold for a few days seems impossible but the work that Dr. Michael Jensen is doing says it isn't. I have asked our doctors at Children's what is the best way to directly support the work that Dr. Jensen and the Center for Childhood Cancer Research is doing - how do we make what seems impossible, possible - the resounding answer is to support the Ben Towne Foundation as 100% of it's proceeds go to Dr. Jensen's work.  I am asking you to get behind this foundation - spread the word, donate money, start a company matching program, do what ever you can to change how pediatric cancer is treated, help me put purpose to what Georgia has had to endure.  Give in honor of Georgia, the friends who are winning their battle, the friends who are still fighting.. give in honor of those who are losing their battle and for those who have already lost. The suffering that I have seen in the past year can't continue, we have to make a difference.

Here is a look back at our journey and the events of the past year:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31pgyYj2s88

Here is where you can go to find out more about the Ben Towne Foundation:
http://bentownefoundation.org/